Dear Madam UN,

I am frankly impressed by your sharp observation.

We eat too much meat, we drink too much, we practise unsafe sex and, as Serrat would say, we grab women’s bottoms.

Carta abierta de Imanol JakaMadam UN, look, I don’t want to offend but I think you, once again, have gone overboard, but this time you have gone too far.

The main problem with global warming, red meat, is not this time that it causes cancer—this time it’s that cow farts are going to set the galaxy on fire. Yes, we know, methane is a real Molotov for the galaxy.

Start trembling, damn you.

My dear UN, the problem the planet is facing is not nuclear power stations, nor fossil fuel industries, nor power plants, nor experimental nuclear bombs tested in the atmosphere and on the ground, nor the military industry, nor the coal industry, nor world power, drugs, and criminal financial lobbies, nor the preference shares scandal, programmed evictions. No, cow farts are the problem. Well done, UN … you are my idol.

Let’s see, my dear UN, the minions of western nations are a bunch of morons, true. There are legions of vegans and health-freakarians eating processed food from gastronomic-terrorism multinationals, also true. The legions of minions are aliens from the new Mad Max of football and gossip shows like Sálvame, true yet again. Dear Madam UN, admit that this time, things have got out of hand and you have gone overboard.

Intensive livestock farming pollutes, true, absolutely, but your truth is a half-truth, in other words, the worst kind of lie.

But intensive livestock farming is common practice in pig and chicken husbandry, but never in cattle. Nowadays we live in a globalised world. Yes, Madam UN, you might not have noticed. A fucking t-shirt pollutes more than 40 cows, farts included.

And you, Madam UN, have you got a smartphone? A car? A laptop? Panty liners? Wipes to clean your hands after eating prawns? Well then, you are right, Madam UN, but apart from being right, my dear, I think you are highly suspicious.

We know about global magnates from the IT industry, who are investing vast amounts of money in sick old Europe to create currents of opinion against meat consumption, which, by the way, forms part of the identity of dozens of generations worldwide.

And they want to feed us human kibble, processed hamburgers, plant-based, by-product of surplus, like American soya beans, full of chemicals and drug of alienation.

We know these new radicals are backed by hundreds of millions of euros in every country in Europe and, as expected, dominate social media. Sadly, not even the Internet, as was predicted, is going to broaden our fucking freedom.

It’s obvious, that the planet is not going to be able to assimilate population growth, only via intelligent technology and leaders.

But, meanwhile, I still have the right to kick up a fuss at the pricks who get rich with illegal enterprises, who want to manipulate our mindsets through headlines.

Dear minions, hard times are coming, yet again. Now that religious radicalism is past its sell-by date, radical opinions are taking over. And you already know that the mob without realising exerts a violence that always turns against it. Read the history books.

Dear Madam UN, I have a suspicion that you, too, are backed by a sponsor.

Dear UN, thanks to your exorbitant initiative, countries like Germany have felt encouraged to discuss the feasibility of raising taxes on meat. As you know … money is in dire need. But no, it will be invested in animal welfare.

I have spent all my life among livestock. I can say that animal cruelty in European farms and abattoirs is practically inexistent. It’s not true.

But let’s move towards what is politically profitable. Let’s say, it’s not true, this money we are going to raise is for animal welfare, while in Italy thousands of Africans die every year.

Pardon Madam UN… that’s no longer a headline, in other words, it doesn’t exist for the masses.

Source of image: Internet (unknown)
Article: Sí, la ganadería afecta al medio ambiente, pero dejar de comer carne no va a salvar el planeta